10 Simple Strategies to Boost Your Happiness and Well-Being

"Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be"
- Abraham Lincoln

Introduction:

Abraham Lincoln famously said “Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be,” which is inspiring and true, but also can be daunting for those who struggle to find happiness despite their best efforts.

It all sounds very simple when people say “just choose to be happy”, but what does that mean? And what does that look like?

The challenge often lies not just in the desire for happiness but in understanding what it truly means and how to achieve it. Happiness is a complex, deeply personal journey that varies greatly from one individual to another.

There are people who outwardly appear to be very happy. They are the life and soul of the party, exude high energy, and seem to have it all - and yet inside they feel deeply unhappy.

Then there are people who are quieter and more thoughtful. You may not think they look particularly happy, but internally they are very peaceful and content.

I think happiness is deeply personal, and it fluctuates depending on what’s going on in your life.

So perhaps the most important things are to know what happiness means to you and feels like for you, and to know where you are now. Is there room for improvement anywhere or are you completely satisfied with everything as it is?

This blog post will explore the multifaceted nature of happiness and provide ten actionable strategies to help enhance your sense of well-being, regardless of your current level of happiness and well-being.

What Gets in the Way of Happiness?

We all want to be happy. We want to feel good about ourselves, and our life choices. Although sometimes that doesn’t seem to be so easy.

Happiness is more than just a fleeting feeling; it is crucial for our overall health and quality of life. It enhances our resilience, boosts our immune system, and can even extend our lifespan. However, our sense of happiness can be obstructed by external influences and internal conflicts that make it seem unattainable.

So instead of simply being able to choose happiness, it can become more complicated. Here are some examples:

• You have a lot of great things to appreciate in your life and you want to be happy, but there’s a constant feeling that something must be missing.

• You feel you can’t be happy when there is so much suffering going on in the world. “How can I be happy when ….. is happening?”

• If only … would happen then you would be happy (if only you made more money, lost weight, had the perfect job or the perfect relationship, etc.).

• You may look to others for your happiness and when those people don’t behave as you expect, you are bitterly disappointed. This could be a partner or spouse, children, family members, etc.

• Perhaps you don’t know how to be happy. Your life experiences may have led you to believe that you don’t deserve or are not meant to be happy.

• There’s a sense that every time things start going well and you start feeling good some kind of disaster will happen to change that.

• You are not happy with yourself, and are deeply affected by the criticism and judgment of others who seem to not want you to be happy.

As you can see, it can be a complex subject, and you may not simply be able to increase your feelings of happiness and levels of well-being overnight.

That’s why I want to share these strategies with you. This blog post aims to demystify happiness and offer practical steps to not only increase your happiness but also sustain it.

10 Strategies for Enhancing Happiness and Well-Being

1. Say Goodbye to Toxic Relationships

   Toxic relationships are one of the biggest drains on personal happiness. These relationships, characterized by negativity, manipulation, or drama, leave you feeling physically, mentally and emotionally depleted. It’s crucial to identify these toxic influences and, where possible, distance yourself from them. Setting boundaries or changing how you interact with these individuals can significantly improve your emotional well-being.

   I like to set an intention before interacting with someone like this along the lines of:

   “I will not allow this person to manipulate my energy in any way, or to pass their energy onto me.”

   Then, I remind myself that their behavior has nothing to do with me. It’s a reflection of what’s going on with them and I don’t need to react or take it on. This works really well.

2. Embrace Healthy Relationships

   On the flip side, surrounding yourself with positive and supportive people can greatly enhance your happiness. These relationships should be cherished and nurtured as they provide a source of comfort, motivation, and joy. Engaging more with people who uplift you will reinforce your sense of self-worth and contribute to a more fulfilled life.

   Pay attention to those people who leave you feeling uplifted and motivated. Know who they are and spend more time with them. A positive attitude can be just as infectious as a negative one.

   “You’re the average of all the people who surround you. So take a look around and make sure you’re in the right surroundings.” - David Burkus

3. Release Perfectionism

   It’s okay to have high standards and to believe in excellence, but if you try to be perfect all the time, you put so much pressure on yourself that you will never be able to live up to it, which creates stress and limits your ability to really enjoy life. So while perfectionism is often seen as a virtue, it can be a major obstacle to happiness.

   As a recovering perfectionist myself, I know this is true. As a perfectionist your intensity and incredibly high expectations (of yourself and others) often make it difficult for others to be around you. People can be intimidated because they feel they will never measure up, that nothing they do will ever be good enough.

   When you feel you need to have very high standards, and you may not understand why everyone else doesn’t just get that. What you don’t realize (as I didn’t) is that your standards can be so impossibly high. So high that nobody (including you) can ever measure up.

   I know from experience that when you let go of the need to do everything perfectly you will feel happier, much more energized and much less stressed. You’ll also find that people will enjoy being around you so much more.

   “Perfectionism is a self destructive and addictive belief system that fuels this primary thought: If I look perfect and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of shame, judgment and blame.” - Brene Brown

4. Let Go of Expectations

   Adjusting your expectations—of yourself and others—can dramatically reduce feelings of disappointment and frustration.

   High expectations often lead to stress and dissatisfaction, especially when they are unrealistic. Recognizing and moderating your expectations can lead to a happier, more contented life.

   Just like most things, expectations can be helpful or not helpful. So it’s important to be aware of the expectations you have and how they are serving you. You may have some unhelpful expectations that you’re not aware of, and they can make life unnecessarily difficult.

   It’s particularly important for those of us who are empathic and/or highly sensitive to be aware of and pay attention to our expectations because we tend to have extremely (and often unrealistically) high expectations of ourselves, and therefore of others.

   Where do you have unrealistic and unreasonable expectations for yourself and others and how are they affecting you? When you recognize them you can change them. This doesn’t mean you lower your standards, but it does mean that you stop punishing yourself, or setting yourself up for disappointment.

“When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.” - Donald Miller

5. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

   Comparison is a common trap that will undermine your self-esteem and happiness. It’s important to remember that everyone’s life path is unique. Focus on your own achievements and personal growth rather than measuring yourself against others. This shift in perspective will lead to increased self-acceptance and happiness.

   Comparing yourself to others will always leave you feeling dissatisfied. It’s a waste of your energy because by comparing you are giving your power away.

   Focus on yourself, what you want, and what you need to do for you, rather than on what other people are or are not doing or do or do not have.

   “The reason why we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind the scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” - Steven Furtick

6. Do More of What You Love

   Engaging in activities that bring you joy is crucial for maintaining mental health and happiness. Whether it’s pursuing a hobby, spending time in nature, or practicing a craft, make time for these joy-bringing activities. They’re essential for your well-being.

   Whatever it is, put it on your calendar. Schedule time for yourself to do something you love. It can be that simple.

   Spend more time doing what you love and you’ll naturally feel happier and more energized.

   “Do what makes YOU happy. Focus on what brings YOU joy. Appreciate and do more things that make YOU smile. Live your life for yourself. You matter! You count! You’re deserving of true happiness! This is YOUR life. Live it to the fullest! Live life with no regrets.” - Stephanie Lahart

7. Put Yourself First

   Self-care is not selfish; it’s necessary. Prioritizing your own needs helps ensure you have the energy and health to care for others and engage in your daily activities. Taking care of yourself should be a top priority, as it supports your well-being and enables you to support others more effectively.

   If you’re used to putting others first all the time, you will ultimately find your energy becoming depleted. So often we want to help others when we are struggling ourselves and then frustration and resentment can build as we become more and more depleted.

   "You cannot get poor enough to help poor people thrive nor sick enough to help sick people get well." – Abraham

8. Know Yourself

   Understanding yourself is the foundation of personal development and happiness. Knowing what makes you tick, what energizes you, and what drains you will help you make choices that better align with your personal values and enhance your life satisfaction.

   How do you develop this level of self-awareness? By paying attention to everything you think and everything you feel. When something bothers you, be willing to explore and use the situation to learn more about yourself.

   I think the more you know yourself energetically and emotionally, the stronger you become and the less threatened you feel by stressful situations or by other people’s behavior.

   The more you know yourself, the more confident, empowered and happier you become, and everyone benefits.

   “The better you know yourself, the better your relationship with the rest of the world.” - Toni Collette

9. Learn to Embrace Change

   Change is inevitable, and learning to accept and embrace it reduces fear and anxiety. Viewing change as an opportunity rather than a threat will open you up to new experiences and growth. Embracing change is a key step in maintaining mental flexibility and happiness.

   Challenges come when you resist change or are afraid of it, because then you will experience more stress and anxiety. When you learn to embrace change and go with the flow of life you open yourself up to more possibilities and more happiness.

   How often has an unexpected change come about for you that felt really uncomfortable at the time, but now when you look back you can see it was probably the best thing that could have happened for you?

   When you learn to accept and even embrace change, rather than being afraid of it or resisting it, you’ll find there’s a lot less stress in your life, which will allow you to feel much happier.

   “Become a student of change. It is the only thing that will remain constant.” - Anthony D’Angelo

10. Allow Others to Help You

    Many people struggle with asking for help, viewing it as a sign of weakness. However, allowing others to assist you strengthens relationships and eases your burdens. Learning to accept help can also be a deeply humbling and enriching experience that enhances your interconnectedness with others.

    How often do you find yourself struggling with something because you don’t like to ask for help? How often are you disappointed when others don’t offer to help you or are not there when you need them?

    You must learn to ask for what you want. Don’t expect others to guess or to know what you need. If you learn to ask, you’ll be surprised how often you’ll receive exactly what you need – or perhaps even more.

    “Asking is the beginning of receiving. Make sure you don’t go to the ocean with a teaspoon. At least take a bucket so the kids won’t laugh at you.” - Jim Rohn

Closing Thoughts

What would it be like if you made your happiness a priority? What would it be like if you started each day by setting an intention to do more of what brings you happiness?

Can you envision a life where you prioritize your happiness every day? What changes would you make? How would your daily routine shift to accommodate more joy? This post invites you to consider these questions and integrate the strategies discussed into your life.

Implementing even a few of these strategies will significantly impact your well-being and happiness. You don’t have to overhaul your life overnight; small, consistent changes can yield profound results over time.

Start today by choosing one strategy to focus on and observe the positive changes that follow. The journey to happiness is a personal and ongoing process. Embrace it and watch as your life transforms.

A great starting point to develop a deeper understanding of yourself is by taking the Personal Energy Assessment, followed by scheduling an Assessment Review Session to discuss your results. This will help you tailor a personal growth path that respects your unique circumstances and traits, setting you on a course to genuine self-fulfillment.

I guide you to clarity, breakthroughs and practical solutions that lead to the positive change you want. Real solutions, real results. Start with a free Personal Energy Assessment, and see what's possible for you.